Don’t Be a Dufus

The Whole Chicken Gay thing.

As a good many of you know, it is extremely difficult to hide behind yourself, lie to yourself and let the world see the front that is what you want people to see. It is difficult to pretend to be a Christian, a Jew, a thug, a ratfink, a gambler or toad sucking wormbag, if […]

0 calorie breakfast.

me :Hello? him: this is bobby me Bobby how can i help you today? him :i had a zero calorie breakfast today me: Oh? him: yes, I ate my sister me (who really wasn’t paying attention) “Oh that’s nice) him. do you know how long it took me? me, No sir? him 10, or 20 […]

A Visit To The Vampires.

Okay, so along with the weight loss crap that has gone on, I have been putting off actively trying to get to Labcorb to get 4 measly vials of blood drawn. It is not like they are trying to excavate for oil right? except they are. The evil sods that go to work as blood […]

Where life doesn’t get in the way,

It has lately come to my attention a few things. One. I am absolutely fucking killer at coming up with ideas for fiction stories. Absolute shit at the execution. Two, if I look at my own history it’s pretty freaking hilarious. I mean how many 15 year olds sneak their best friend into church camp, […]

It is Tuesday,

Work has been fantastic. That’s about all I can say about that. I’m sure you understand. I got called a “God damned fucking bitch”. That made my day. Can I just point out that it didn’t upset me at all. I gave him to a supervisor, and life was fantastic. She handled it in a […]

my mom is a laundromat towel stealer

I walk into the bathroom, and there is this BRIGHT RED towel on the toilet. Not exactly an odd occurrence in our household I will admit, apart from the fact i have never seen this towel before -in my life- IN MY LIFE it is red. Blood Fucking red. the conversation goes as follows Me:When […]

How to Impress your Trainer at work.

LUNCH!!!!! The bell was called, and we ran out to get food into our bellies. Food being important. Those that wanted to suck carcinogenic into their lungs ran outside to “fresh” air. And that’s where the story fell apart. The girl who sits next to me runs to her car, excited “LUNCH and SMOKE” she […]