When my mom turned fifty, I was thirteen and didn’t know zippy about throwing a fantastic party. When she turned sixty, I was twenty three, heavily pregnant and in England. Too far to throw a party and unable to fly because of a giant squirming watermelon in my stomach that suddenly decided to start kicking. Oh and my hand was in a cast because a Guiness glass broke while I was doing dishes. True story ya’ll, doing dishes is dangerous shit.
So my mom is turning seventy this year. I know a lady does not reveal her age, but my moms smoking hot for seventy ya’ll. Like my neighbors called me a liar and said she had to only be fifty five. Yep my moms a killer woman. So for this birthday by damned I was intent on doing something over the top and fantastic, now it does sorta suck that the day I chose happens to be superbowl sunday. (Like I give a rats ass about football, but yanno some people do, so yeah) . So with that in mind I am willing to make this party fun, and possibly marginally aimed at those who want to stare at a tv screen and yell at people throwing a ball back and forth. Well those players do have might fine rears, so I might join in a little bit.
That’s just to begin with, because I do not want my family thinking we are a bunch of red neck hicks that don’t know how to throw a party. Cause oh by gods we do, damnit.
I’m also planning on having some snazzy decorations, making it look like a freaking party!.
Oh the Margarita cupcakes? Oh yeah, in margarita glasses, with crystalized sugar on the rim in sparkly colors, Oh hells YES is this gonna be a party to remember.
I am so excited about it.
I can’t hardly wait to see it.
I realize this is three blog posts today, but I’m antsy. So…yes.
How did I break my mom? She’s gonna just be so darn happy when she see’s this party I am throwing her. She knows I’m throwing a party, she has no idea what all I am doing (no not even if she actually reads this blog post, which she doesn’t anyway so what does it matter?)
OH and a brisket cause everything is better with beef.
I am so stupidly excited over this I cannot even begin to explain it all.
when asked though “what do you want for your birthday” her response?
A watch. Gah…Maybe I can find her a neat watch with a skull on it. No wait that’s something I would like not the other way around. Way to go Lori! thinking about yourself lol.
But I do want this to be fantastic for her and I am going to do everything in my power for it to be. ROCK ON party hard ya’ll.